Dealing with Change

11:05 PM. Geneva, Switzerland. I've been thinking a bit about how this summer is a transition period for me and all my lovely senior (rising freshman now, I guess??) friends. For the last four years, we've been together during long hours at school, occasional movie outings, school dances, and of course, board game nights. In just about a month's time, many of us are going to disperse around the country to start learning how to live on our own, packing our lives and histories into one room (half a room, because of roommates I suppose).

I guess it didn't really hit me until really late into the end of my senior year that I wouldn't see these amazing people every day anymore. For the first time that I could remember, my summer was filled with travel plans, not endless hours at dance camp. And while I'm thrilled to be taking French classes here at the University of Geneva and having the opportunity to tour this beautiful city, I can't help but feel a pang of regret for the time that I'm missing out on with my friends at home.

me and ma cute friend à Genève

Having a taste of living on my own here in Europe has made me realize how much I'm actually going to miss my family. Within a week of being in Hamburg, I was already missing my parents' home-cooked food and the comfort of my bed every night. During my first week in Geneva, I called my mom nearly every night.

Honestly, I'm a little bit scared that I'll lose contact with my closest friends now. Sure, my Male Friend #1 (that's you, Eric) and Female Friend #1 (and you, Seohyun) are both going to be in California with me, but we're going to be living such disparate lives that it won't really be the same as sitting next to each other in Chatt Time every day, where Male Friend #1 played Tetris the entire time while Female Friend #1 and I giggled over egg cooking videos on YouTube. I guess I just have to accept that our friendships might not always involve telling each other every minute detail of our lives, but perhaps just the important ones, and our own shared experiences.

a (very rare) photo of the Cali Gang all in one photo

As for my friends going to school in other states, there's just a few thousand miles keeping us apart. Of course, with FaceTime and Snapchat and everything we have now, it's easy to forget how far apart we really are. Nonetheless, I'm excited to see how all my friends change in college, and I myself am excited to change too – hopefully for the better. For now, I'm just trying to be grateful for the times we've been together, the laughs, the struggles, and everything in between.

Hopefully, plastering some photos around my dorm room will help me feel a little less homesick (I also asked Anna to draw me a canvas, so I can be reminded of her and her beautiful artwork in college <3 ).

Side note: I apologize if this blog post is a little confusing and disjointed to read, but I was prompted into a little late-night reflective mood after talking to my friend, Vickie. She moved to Geneva from Johns Creek four years ago because of her dad's work, and she'll be moving back soon. I know it's a hard time for you buddy, but you're incredible and I believe in you :)

goofy snapchat shenanigans during golden hour :)

A lil thank you to all my beautiful and incredible friends for making my life brighter,

Ellie ♡